THE SPECTACULAR DANCE
I’m at some function, everyone’s dancing, but as soon as my partner and I start dancing, the crowd parts to watch and cheer us because we are choreographed to perfection and are SPECTACULAR!
THE POOL CHALLENGE
I walk into a dive bar, I’m a stranger. Some jerk is playing pool with his jerky buddies. They make disparaging remarks about me, so I challenge the jerk to a game of pool. Him and his jerky buddies laugh, but he takes the challenge anyway. I totally thrash him while remaining super-cool at all times. At first he looks like he’s going to get angry, but at the last second his buddy touches him on the arm which miraculously turns him into Mr Super-Nice. He has a change of heart, smiles, congratulates me, and welcomes me to the bar.
THE VENTILATION DUCT
I could have just listened at the door, but that’s no fun. Instead I crawl along the ventilation duct which positions me just above the room where the two baddies are having the crucial reveal-all conversation, which starts just as I arrive, and finishes when I move 1mm and create a creaking sound that makes them look up to exactly where I am. It’s ok though, I’ve got all the information I need to save the day.
THE GREAT ESCAPE
I’m driving through a city to escape the baddies. After crashing my car into some crates of fruit, I leap out and carry on by foot. I will run at high speed across several busy roads while looking behind me and not getting hit by anything, and will then join in with a St Patrick’s Day parade that is conveniently passing through, enabling me to hide long enough for the baddies to lose me.
THE SPONTANEOUS SPEECH
I walk into a bar (again), there is some reason why I need to have my say about something to someone in there. As soon as I utter the first few words, the jukebox music screeches to a halt, and everyone goes silent. I deliver an award-worthy speech; I’m making it up as I go along, and yet it is word perfect, everything flows, it is poignant, dramatic (but not overly so), and leaves everyone in awed silence. There may follow some applause, I’m not sure, maybe even a few tears. Either way, I’m pretty sure I’ll be looking fabulous throughout.
What have you only ever seen in movies that you would like to do in real?
(This post was inspired by a recent post on Slouching Towards TV that you may like to read too.)