I once told quite a long joke to an old boyfriend. When I reached the end, he laughed and then told me that he had heard it before. I asked why he hadn’t stopped me if he’d heard it before, and he said “I like to see your face when you get to the punchline and you know you got it right.” Ha!
Telling jokes is quite an art. Aside from just being able to remember them, there’s the timing, the emphasis, the tone, all of those can make or break a joke. Everyone tells jokes now and again, and I think a lot of people can be slotted into certain joke-teller personality types. I’ve gone for a mixture of ‘he’ and ‘she’ in my list here; I can’t claim it’s a completely random choice, I felt drawn in particular directions with them, that’s not to say that both types don’t exist in both the sexes! Look out for these types at a dinner party near you…
Unfunny one-liner guy: He constantly comes out with very unfunny one-liners and jokes, and will chuckle heartily at his offerings. He seems oblivious to the fact that people aren’t amused. Instead he focuses on the one or two people who politely laugh, and accuses the others of having no sense of humour.
The comedy genius: Not only does he know all the best jokes, but his timing is brilliant. As soon as he starts on a joke, we’re already laughing because we know it’s going to be good.
The “What was it again?” joke teller: She remembers part of the joke, maybe the beginning, maybe the punchline, maybe the general story, never the whole thing; but this doesn’t stop her from trying to stumble her way torturously through it (I think I might be this one quite often!).
The inappropriate joker: The more sexually-geared or offensive the joke, the better. The problem is, he isn’t very sensitive to his environment and will come out with them at inappropriate times, leaving people feeling awkward and embarrassed. Call me a prude, but there’s a time and place, ya know? Similar to the unfunny one-liner guy, he will be oblivious to what he is doing and will continue to think he is hilarious.
The laugher: She remembers jokes, but find them so funny that she can’t get through telling them because she is laughing so much. We listen in anticipation with big smiles, wanting to join in with the laughter, but not having a clue what she’s saying.
The spoiler – He will ruin other people’s jokes, either by revealing the punchline before the teller has got to it, or by interrupting and correcting him along the way.
Can you think of any other joke-teller types?
And I couldn’t have a post about jokes without telling a couple –
THE ELDERLY MAN
An elderly man is stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and is asked where he is going at this time of night.
The man replies, “I am on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late.”
The officer asks, “Really? Who is giving a lecture like that at this time of night?”
The man replies, “That would be my wife.”
THE TALKING DOG
A man goes to the circus and asks the proprietor if he wants to buy a talking dog.
“A talking dog!?’ he exclaims, “Show me.”
So the man turns to his dog and says “What’s the opposite of smooth?”
“Rough” says the dog.
“What’s that stuff on the outside of trees called?”
“And what do you call those big Elizabethan collars?”
“Another word for gossip?”
At this point the circus chap stops him, “I’ve seen enough. You are clearly wasting my time. Get lost!”
As they walk home, the man turns to the dog and says “Well that wasn’t very impressive, was it?”
“It’s your own fault for asking such stupid questions.” replies the dog.
Feel free to share any of your best jokes below, just make sure you tell them right ok?