Please reassure me that you have, at one time or another, done some of these things too…
1) Have an imaginary argument with someone about something that you think they might say or do. Then when it comes to it, they don’t say or do that thing at all and you’re kind of disappointed that you don’t get to use those great comebacks that you planned when you were having the imaginary argument with them. (No, I’m not arguing with voices in my head, the people are real, they’re just not really saying the things I imagine them saying; it’s completely different!).
2) You’re somewhere like a bar, and you’re singing along to some music that’s playing. It comes to a part where you don’t know the words, so you pretend that you’re suddenly very thirsty and reach for your drink which you will keep sipping until it gets to a bit where you know the words again. (Nobody will see through that one right?).
3) Have a dream that your spouse/partner wrongs you in some way, and then when you wake up, even though you know perfectly well that it was just a dream, you can’t help but feel furious towards them in real for the thing they did in your dream. (What do you mean that’s unreasonable?! If they could do it in your dream, then they could do it in real!).
4) You’re out shopping. You come across something you really like, consider it for a while, then look at the price tag and discover that it is far too expensive for you. In case anyone is watching, you don’t want them to think you can’t afford it, so you carry on looking at the item for a while longer as if you are still considering it. (Yes it DOES matter what anyone else thinks about me even if I’ll never see them again!).
5) Tell your spouse/partner that you want them to help you with something when actually what you mean is that you want them to do it all, while you point out how they’re doing it wrong. (Well if they did it right, you wouldn’t have to point out what they were doing wrong…right?).
Do you do any of those? Or do you have anything else you do that you would include on a list like this? Do tell!
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